"There's a point in life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything, but it's not giving up. It's realizing that you don't need certain people and their crap." Tweet This

Just because you can post it to Facebook doesn’t mean you should.

From what I’ve gathered from my newsfeed and my Facebook "friends" that are still in high school, I have noticed a disturbing trend that wasn’t prominent when I went to La Costa Canyon. For their 15th, 16th and 17th birthdays, teens are renting party bus limos and getting wasted in them. Partying is part of being a teen and I’m not going to pretend like I don't partake, however what I do have a problem with is what goes on in these limo buses. I’m talking about a limo orgy.
Let me give you a mental picture of the party. The teens pile into the party bus with bottles of hidden alcohol and crank up the music. Then the boys sit on the limo seating area and the girls give them lap dances, to the point where they have their skirts all the way hiked up and pretty much anything is game. Girls are grinding on the guys while using stripper poles as balance. I’m not a fan of dancing to rub out a boner, sorry. It’s not like a high school dance or even club dancing but so trashy and wrong to see kids this young acting like skanks. They are out of control! Everyone hooks up with someone and then, when they all disembark, it’s like what happens on the bus stays on the bus, except for the photos that must go up on Facebook. I really wish I could post some of the photos but I don’t want to cause any trouble. And I also would like to know what their parents would think if they saw what they were paying for when they rent the limo. It’s horrifying to see this. Tweet This

If there is one thing I've learned about over this past year, it's time.

Have you ever noticed how time seems to pass ever so slowly when you wish it would fly by? And that it does the opposite when we don't have a chance to stop and think about it. There is no better cure and no harsher sentence than time. The hardest lesson is learning that you can't fast forward or rewind, you can only deal with what is currently in front of you. How many times have you thought that if you knew something would be the last, you'd do something different? Well don't. At the time, it was everything you wanted. You can't be regretful for that. But for the future you know to savor what you are given and treat everything as if it were "your last." Tweet This

Doing something that scares you is far easier than deliberating over doing something that scares you - Emily V.

I do not understand how people do not sweat when they work out. Especially in a 90 + degree room. For 90 minutes. Today when I came out of my Bikram class, I was drenched in sweat to the point where my hair was slicked back, my clothes were soaked and I looked like I had walked through a storm without an umbrella, while there were women there that had dry hair, and only looked mildly dewy.
Bikram Yoga is a type of yoga that is done in a hot room (about 90-100 degrees) for 90 minutes. You are not to leave the room and abstain from drinking water for the first 25 minutes of class. You do 26 postures, with two sets of each one. The standing series is an hour and the floor is 30 minutes. You sweat balls.
I love it.
Today was my first day back at Bikram in about five or six months. I got so busy with school and work that I just couldn't find the time. I've been doing yoga since I was thirteen when I found out that I had Scoliosis. I found Bikram when I was seventeen and have been doing it ever since. I tried going back to other forms of yoga because the cost is so high in the city, but I couldn't. I can't achieve the same feeling after that I do with Bikram. I feel like I get a much deeper stretch and it's like getting an intense workout while stretching and strengthening all in one. And it work wonders for my back. And works as a stress release. The benefits are so numerous. I really like the challenge and the heat doesn't really bother you once you've been practicing for a while. I've decided that I need to pick a day and time and just go religiously to keep up with it. I've missed it.

http://www.bikramyoganyc.com/default.htm Tweet This

Live your life.

When was the last time you did something for the first time? Tweet This

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They are going to have some attractive kids.

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Random Facts

-It takes 7 seconds for food to pass from mouth to stomach.
-A human hair can hold 3 kg.
-The length of the penis is three times the length of the thumb.
-The femur is as hard as concrete.
- A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
- Women blink twice as much as men.
-We use 300 muscles just to keep our balance as we stand. Tweet This

Current Song Obsession: Power Mix-Tiesto

You have become what you have always been
light flickering around, peripheral vision
no words we can speak, our paths have been chosen
but all trails that we trek,
should lead us back to here because our

love comes again
just when i've broken down i found
love can come again
you've got to believe that

love comes again
just when i've broken down i found
love can come again

dig within me, turn all the secret stones
forests and fields, breathing with blood and bones
still no words we can speak, our paths have been chosen
but all trails that we trek,
-should lead us back to here because our

love comes again
just when i've broken down i found
love can come again
you've got to believe that

love comes again
just when i've broken down i found
love can come again Tweet This

The way I see it.

August is sneaking up on us. Stores are stocked with back to school clothes. Summer is almost over. Where did July go? I can't say that I haven't had a good summer. It was definitely a lot better than last year's. For awhile I was sad because it wasn't turning out like any summer before. I don't have the beach at my disposal and it hasn't felt like a break from school. I've been working full time and taking a class. I've felt like I've been missing something. However, I've realized that I can't even compare it to anything else because I am in New York, and that in itself is an adventure. I love being here and I think being out of school, you really get to appreciate the beauty of the city. I've tried to cross something off my To Do list every time I have a day off from work. I still have yet to spend a day in central park, but I've requested more time off from work in August to enjoy the last moments of summer. Most of my friends are here which I haven't been able to say that for a few summers now. It truly feels like for the first time that I am on my own, and I like it. I've been trying to just do whatever I want to do, and that's my new approach on life. College goes way too fast to not enjoy every minute of it. I almost can't wait until school starts again because with that comes all my friends who weren't lucky enough to spend the summer here. Tweet This

"Sometimes you just have to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve." Tweet This

If you really knew me...

You'd know that:
-I am a really emotional person.
- I care entirely too much about what other people think.
- I can promise that I will ALWAYS be there for you.
- I take everything to heart.
-I have high expectations and I am almost always let down.
-I treasure my friendships because I know what it's like to be on the outside.
- I am extremely picky about the people in my life and I don't let them in easily. But the ones I do give a piece of myself to are really special to me. I guess it's better to be choosy than to let everyone have a piece of you.
-I can't deal with fake girls and fake friends. Grow up.
-I feel a year younger than I really am; weird, I know.
- I have trust issues.
-I keep a lot of what I am feeling inside. It leads to people thinking that I don't care, except I care more than I should.
- I’m the type of person that has to hear things myself. I am so stubborn and regardless of what my friends tell me, I have to do it the hard way. That way I know it’s real and I can’t ever wonder “what-if.”
-I am indecisive and it's such a problem that it takes me forever to choose something as simple as an outfit.
-There's one person that I can't get over no matter how hard that I try.
-I actually mean what I say and I hate when people say things that they can't make happen.
-I don't like games. I like people to be straight up with me.
-I've never had a real boyfriend.
-Moving across the country from San Diego to Shitsville, Florida my senior year of high school has traumatized me.
-I am sometimes scared that I am not normal.
-I hate that I am often not taken serious, even though I follow through with just about everything that I do.
-I am always afraid that I will disappoint someone by not doing the "right" thing. Tweet This

My Inspiration:

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Photos that make me happy

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Bliss.


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You really want to know what's on my mind?

Family stuff makes me so upset these days. It’s so frustrating that I have to choose between my parents even though I don’t want to. My dad makes me feel guilty that I want to stay with my mom when I am only going to be back in Florida for a week and haven’t seen her in eight months. I shouldn’t have to feel that way! He knows that I am closer with her and somewhere he had to know that was going to happen all along. It’s like I’m the parent and he’s the child. I just spent a few days with him in Boston...I feel like I’m walking on eggshells, or rather, what feels like broken glass. It's actually funny that I am majoring in Psych because my family is so fucked up and I in turn have so many problems that it's comforting to know most psychologists suggest that all signs point towards family relationships as the number one cause.
The house we have in Florida is nothing like a home and I don’t even have a room there anymore. It almost makes me uncomfortable to go back there. This time of year makes me really nostalgic for Enci town. Currently, I don’t really consider myself to have a home. I loathe Sanford probably more than anything in my life. It is in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do and a place nobody ever leaves. It is full of rednecks and uneducated and ignorant African Americans. Think apple bottom jeans and boots with the fur. There are thunderstorms just about every day of the summer and after growing up 5 minutes away from the beach, an hour means hitting up the beach for a bit is not happening. I can’t even convey how much I HATE that place. I consider my real home to be in California. 2978 Las Olas court to be exact. I hate that we had to move my senior year of high school. I will forever resent this decision made by my parents. You don’t really realize how much a home really means until you don’t have one. Coming back from college, all I really want is to come back to something comfortable, with the amenities that you don’t have at school-meals cooked for you, laundry magically done, and my room. My bed. My dog. The stuff that I left behind. I guess you know you are grown up when the only thing you’d go back for is family...except that’s broken too. Nothing is the same anymore and I feel like my parents aren’t there for me anymore. Maybe that’s just what growing up means and your friends become your family.
Thank god I have wonderful, supportive friends who have been there for me when I wanted to look to my family and couldn’t. I love you with all my heart. I really don’t know what I would do without you <3 Tweet This

I found this yesterday and almost died laughing. Insanely funny and true.

"WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE A HIPSTER. PUT ON MY GLASSES AND MY PLAID SHIRT IM GUNNA CHECK MY FLICKR. BEFORE I LEAVE GRAB MY TRIANGLE AND MY CAMERA BAG CUZ WHEN I LEAVE FOR THE FOREST I AIN’T COMING BACK. IM TAKING DREAMY VINTAGE PHOTOS, WEARING INDIE CLOTHES CLOTHES, SARCASM BLOWING UP OUR CONVOS. DROP TOPPIN PLAYING OUR FAVORITE PLAYLISTS, BAD GRAMMAR GETTING US REALLY PISSED PISSED, TRYING TO GET ON THE RECOMMENDED BLOGS LIST. DON’T STOP MAKE IT POP HANG YOUR DREAMCATCHER UP, TONIGHT IMA FIGHT ANONS TILL THE SUNLIGHT. TIK TOK ON THE CLOCK BUT THE REBLOGGING NEVER STOPS NO OH OH OH, NO OH OH OH." Tweet This

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So I FINALLY made it back to the city after a LONG day of traveling. I left Cape Cod yesterday at 10:30 am and didn't get back until 11 at night! I was supposed to get in at 5:45, but a train crossed 4 tracks in Greenwich, CT and tore down some of the electrical lines. My train got stuck in New Haven at 4:45 and as of 9 pm, we still hadn't moved. I got a car service to drive me into the city, so I am back :) I think it always takes going somewhere else to value what you have. Sometimes I take the city for granted, that there is always something to do, that I can get whatever kind of food that I'm craving at whatever hour, and that I live in such an interesting place. As I was coming into the city on the FDR, I was dazed by the beautiful lights and skyline that you only see when you leave Manhattan. As much as I liked taking a break from city life, it's great to be back.

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The Spark.

It's rare but when it happens, you feel so conscious of the moment. Your heart starts beating fast. And faster. You feel ethereal. There's a fluttery feeling in your chest. You feel like you can't breathe. You feel a sudden jolt of adrenaline that almost makes you jump. It's as if your heart has sent the same feeling to your brain and you feel like you can't speak, let alone utter anything arousing. It's as if your body needs the energy to not fall over because it is so captivated by the person standing in front of you. You can't control it and you wonder what it is about this person that makes you feel that way. You can't explain it, but all you know is this feeling; truly one of the best feelings in the world. Tweet This

I got a fabulous new MACBOOK PRO :) Everything happens for a reason; it truly does. This is going to be a super short post because I am tired but I promise I will post something better tomorrow. Leaving you with two things I found that make me happy:

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Being the genius that I am, I spilled a liquid substance all over my laptop and it is currently in a coma. Depending on if it wakes up or I have to shell out over a grand to get a new one.... This means no Internet access for at least a week, thank god I have an iPhone,but it is so much harder to use this tiny screen. I am beyond devastated because I have so much new music that I haven't back up since sometime last semester and a lot of things that I have written since then and they could just be GONE :( so my posts will be limited this week and I don't have any inspiring photos to add. On that note, Happy Fourth! Tweet This

You can't change what has already happened. You can't take back anything you've said. You have to live with the consequences, learn from your mistakes and change the future. Tweet This